CALF_News_Feb_March_2019

20 CALF News • February | March 2019 • www.calfnews.net parents happy because you feel obligated to … don’t. This life is way too short to play the guilt game and do something you don’t love and want to do. There are so many mental health issues in farming that get swept under the rug because of how stressful this lifestyle is. Make sure it’s the lifestyle you and your family want.While having the transition planning conversations, both sides need to be honest and keep an open mindset.We have to remember that everything we’re talking about is material possessions. Like George Strait says,“I’ve never seen a hearse with a luggage rack.” Here are my two thoughts when it comes to transition planning. First, my parents built their operation on their own. Yes, us girls helped. We spent a lot of time in tractors, trucks, four-wheelers, etc., helping. But, it was their money and time that built the farm. Second, I am a fully functioning adult who will figure my life out and be happy, with or with- out any inheritance from my parents. I have watched them work relentlessly for years. Now they are wanting to slow down, travel and enjoy more free time and not so much work. Since they started with nothing, so much of their money was reinvested in land purchases. I have told them from day one of planning that they need to be happy, and if that means selling a piece of land to get cash to do that, that is what free in life.We learned patience, manners and that Mom was not our friend, but the woman who would mold us to be the young women we are today.We learned to be independent.We learned how to be productive adults. My parents have started the process necessary to passing the farm on to us without Uncle Sam taking all of it. They started with sitting down individu- ally with each of us three girls and our spouses. They asked us what our vision for the future of their farm is. They asked us what we would be interested in doing. They asked if there was anything that was especially sentimental to us. They gave us the opportunity to be frank, to be open and honest, and they listened to what we said. Then they went to work with each other and decided what they wanted. As I write this article, they are finishing up work with their lawyers and their plan. Then they will sit us down together and tell us their plan. It will be in the open; everybody will know exactly what is going to happen. If there are problems, they will be addressed together. It will not be a surprise after their funerals. My husband is farming/ranching in partnership with his parents and grandma, so we both come from farming families with multiple siblings involved in the transition to the next generation. I appreciated that my parents, from the beginning, were willing to listen to each of us about our thoughts. I have no idea how the conversations went with my sisters and their husbands, but I will be very upfront with you all about how our conversation went. Just a brief background. I’m 26, married with no kids. My two older sisters are also married, and one has three kids. Whether you’re reading this from the side that has already put in the time/ money or my side that is just starting to put in the time and the little bit of money that we can, I hope you’re open and honest with yourself about what you want and feel. If you don’t want to be a farmer and are just doing it to make your TRANSITION PLANNING Continued from page 16 they need to do.We will all be alright. They have worked so hard and want to pass it down and not sell it at an auc- tion. That is their choice and their choice alone. By raising children who work hard to build their own lives, they gave us the best gift of all – the ability to know how to work and not shy away from it. Transition planning is hard. Final words from me – you need to be happy. Maybe that means selling everything and traveling the world. Maybe that means working on your farm until the day you die. Maybe that means telling your family that you don’t want to be involved in continuing the operation. Maybe that means working side by side with your family for as long as you can. Whatever it means, make sure your happiness and contentment are included in the process. The last thing I will say is that we just want to know what is going to transpire and not have a surprise while grieving a loss. I am a firm believer that everybody in the family farming operation needs to know the details. Farming is a lifestyle. It’s a hard life- style and there is a lot of money tied up in the operation, which causes people to act crazy sometimes. I encourage you to take a serious minute to consider what is going to make you happy, then make a plan and implement it. Family dinners will taste a lot better when everybody knows. 